Hooi to the Hooi

Tomorrow, it’s gonna be one of those nerve-wracking moments again. I know it’s probably a piece-of-cake to many, but I’m so so nervous. >< If I make it out alive, I’ll treat myself to ice-cream. Tonnes of it.

Dear invisible stranger, wish me luck.

I just realized…

I am lost.

So so lost. 

Is it normal to feel so aimless at 23? Or 24. actually it’s not my birthday yet so I’m just gonna stick to 23 okayy =_= 

Don’t get me wrong, I still know what I want. I just don’t know how to get there anymore. 

It’s like walking through a jungle without a compass. Or walking through a very dark tunnel with a broken torchlight not knowing what’s lurking around those creepy corners. The fire has died. This is officially the worst I’ve ever felt in a very long time.

Please just let this be a phase. Or something, somewhere.. just give me an indication. A clue. Anything. Knock some sense into me. Before I start feeling bits and pieces of myself slowly disappearing away. 

K this is scary. I am scared. 

T-T

J.O.E

Sometimes I daydream

Sometimes I wonder

Wouldn’t it be nice

If we were together

We would be best friends

We would always be there for each other

We would be pieces of a beautiful jigsaw puzzle

Pieces that would fit so very perfectly together

We would spend our days doing crazy things like chasing doves

We would listen to music only you and I love

We would play our guitars till our fingers hurt

We would roll around in the mud and cover ourselves with dirt

We would hold hands and walk barefoot on the beach

We would fantasize about what it’s like being awfully rich

We would look at snowflakes and eat candy canes

We would never get bored of walking together in the rain

We would run around screaming random stuff to strangers

Just like how we would annoy the hell out of one another

We would read philosophical books and pretend that we’re smart

We would argue all day on whether chocolate doughnuts taste better than blueberry tarts

We would just laze around and watch awesome cartoons

We would wear matching t-shirts and look like total loons

We would sit around all day and stuff ourselves with ice-cream

We would and we could..

If only you and I were a team

I know I’ll wake up someday

And this will all be just a dream

You’ll still be you

And I’ll still be me

You’ll still be living your happy life with her

And I’ll still be here..all alone with my fears

I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again

I’ll never find someone just like you out there, never again

Someone who can make me feel so much joy and inspiration, yet so much pain

Someone whom I’ll always think about, every single time I look out my window pane

But I’ll be fine, everything’s gonna be okay

Maybe it’s true after all – what they always say

It’ll take some time but I’m sure I’ll find a way..

Guess you will never know

That this song’s about you anyway

————————————————————————————————

Something that I wrote last year. Reading it makes me feel like I should start writing again. It’s kind of an awesome way to escape from everything for a little while. Pen. Paper. iPhone. Guitar. Confused mind. Ready, set.. Go.

And no, J.O.E isn’t a person’s name. It’s the title of the song. XD